I was talking to one of my daycare workers today. And there's just been so much going on with her and one of the other daycare workers at the centre that she's wondering if she should cancel the Christmas party. She feels that she'd be disappointing the kids, people would be let down, etc. But when I looked at her face and with everything going on, I didn't think she should go with the party. She really has an empty bucket - the whole idea that she's been giving, giving, giving and there is nothing else to give.
She asked me what she should do. Let me say that if any of you "tunaheads" ask me for advice, I'll give it to you. What you do with it is up to you. I won't get mad at you if you take it or don't...it's your life. So, I told her that I would cancel the party. Yes, the kids would be disappointed. But it's not like they won't have another Christmas party. Why couldn't the daycare start a New Year tradition instead? Way less partying in January and it might be fun to have something during that time. I went on and on, blah, blah, blah...but the bottom line, I told her she needs to take care of herself mentally and physically. When your bucket is empty, you are no good to anybody. You are resentful for having to give. And you deplete yourself of even more energy to get on with life.
But this whole idea that we have to be a martyr or to have to constantly give just isn't right. Don't get me wrong, I fall into that trap sometimes. And sometimes, certain situations call for it. But then I go back to what my priorities are, what I think is important and how am I going to mentally and emotionally help myself. I say no...a lot. It sounds selfish to take care of oneself, but I know I'm so much more giving when I do take care of myself because I actually have the energy to give. I try very hard to stay away from the empty bucket syndrome.
So, it will be interesting to see what she decides to do. I'm always up for a party in January.
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